Friday, May 31, 2013

42 Days later..

It has been 42 days since I last saw what facebook looks like. And, it has been fantastic. For all of you who are worried about the enormous withdrawal symptoms, there isn't such a thing. I did not miss it even for a day.
Then again, I did not even stick to the plan of writing blogs instead. I am actually writing after 41 days. So, what happend when I deactivated facebook? Let me fill you in.
I deactivated on the 17th April and also deleted the app from my mobile and my tablet. I was worried that the weight of sheer boredom and muscle memory would be too heavy to resist checking the app on mobile for a 'just a little while'. Next morning started a little differently, instead of wasting time looking at other people's updates (or rather finding updates from the haystack of junk and spam), I actually read news. By the time evening came and into the next day I had completely forgotten my 634 'friends'.
The real ones actually called to check on my sudden decision and genuinely agreed to all my rant.

42 days later I realized that in fact my will to be away from a useless activity which was clearly becoming a nagging addiction was greater than the pull that activity had on me. Its funny because the only reason I did not deactivate my profile earlier was because I never thought I would be able to do it. But, believe me when I say this YOU DONT MISS FACEBOOK. After a day or so, you just dont.
I would encourage everyone to try it, its liberating and requires no rehab.
I am actually planning to rejoin the service, which is as easy as signing back in. But, I wont do it without a big spring cleaning of my friend list. No one can have 634 friends, its impossible. So, how do I plan to go about cleaning it? I have come up with a method, it goes like this...
...if I have ever in my life till now spent more than 5 mins talking to someone face to face in my timeline, they will stay in my timeline. For the rest, lets be honest, If we havent spoken in all these years for even 5 mins, what are the chances we are going to do so in the near future? Let me break this to you, 'close to none'. End of the day the only updates and photos we actually care about on facebook are from the people we secretly hate ;)

-everyone who has ever called me 'dear' is going too.

-you like your own pics? bye bye

-oh, you like ending all comments with 'god bless'? Adios

-football fanatic living in India and cursing everyone after a loss as if you are from the home counties? Take a hike

There would still be people who I would delete from the list, even if we have spoken for hours. The only reason for this would be: that you are a chronic spammer, and have been sending me 'bubble safari' and 'cityville' invitation everyday. Or, have been asking all your friends to like photos of dead soldiers or unwell kids. I am going to create an excel sheet (yes, I am that old) and keep track of how many spammy posts you make. If you hit the threshold of 3 posts in 2 days (I will be watching) you are out. So, DO NOT CLICK THAT LIKE BUTTON.

See you all there soon.

[most of this post has been written in jest. Please do not change your FB behavior and spam as much as you can (i hope someone falls into this trap)]

-more later

1 comment:

  1. This is the best! It's been too long since I've read posts from you - please blog while you're in Europe!